A friend of the Trust shares this collection of poetry and photographs produced from their time in France, encapsulating the themes of transience and presence.
Lac du Bourdon
After a day of cleaning the paint flakes,
cobwebs, dust and dead insects out of the old house,
(which hadn’t felt a human heart beating inside its
walls for over two and a half years),
we set off for the lake.
We parked the car,
made our way through the trees
and they opened before us like a great lung,
this is what we came for, the rushes, the ripples and the peace,
a vast sky-mirror, set into the earth to remind us
who we are and where we came from.
The gift
The greatest gifts I have
are not those I have created for myself
but the freedom I have been given to create them,
then to look upon my works and compare them to yours.
For all I have done I have not caused a single blade of grass to grow,
not a solitary bird to sing or just one drop of rain to fall,
all I have done is to take what you have given,
quarry the mountains, cut the trees,
mine the earth and leave love,
the greatest of your gifts,
for priests and fools
to manage.
Seeing
Wherever I look in this world
there are always things to see that
are beautiful, fascinating or worthwhile.
Eyes see, they don’t judge, it’s fear
of what they see that causes the judgement,
fear wants order, control and stasis rather than change
but to my eyes alone a flower is a flower in bloom or decay.
There’s a fork in the road behind my eyes, one way
leads to the innocence of a child with no words
to name things, the other way leads
to a world of trouble.
The Future
Up on the high plains
of Northern Burgundy there
are dozens of tall wind turbines,
from a distance they look beautiful and elegant
as they move lazily in the breeze
but up close you can hear
their great blades
slicing the air,
creating spirals
from straight lines with
their slow and measured turn,
up close they are more powerful than beautiful,
the hum of their generators like drones
on huge aeolian harps, singing out
across the rolling wheatfields
announcing the future.
Eternity
Sometimes I long to know
just a split second of eternity,
the endless awareness of being
and eternity being what it is means
a split second of it would be all of it.
Then I think of the eternals, the souls,
the gods, the angels and all the heavenly beings
and I wonder if they long to know just a split second of life,
after all, even a split second of life would be a whole life,
filled with colour, sound, light and sensation.
And as I contemplate these things a curious
feeling comes over me and none
of it really matters any more,
because one comes after the other
and in any case, through no wanting or worthiness
on my part, they sometimes come together.
Devils
So it’s come to this,
seventy years old, driving down
a French road halfway through
my summer break.
What happened to
the firebrand who was going
to right the wrongs and change the world?
He met a girl, got married,
had kids, bought a house and a car,
then spent the next fifty years learning one
important lesson.
He couldn’t say
whether he’d changed
anyone or anything else for the better,
only that he’d confronted a few of his devils,
righted some of his own wrongs and was probably a
slightly better person for having done so.
Morning mist
We had moved on
to another part of France,
we woke early, before the dawn
and sat together on the terrace for morning contemplation,
as the light came it revealed the distant mountains
and a valley spread before us, filled with mist.
I recognised it immediately,
why wouldn’t I? I am born of this,
made of this and what is true for the world
is just as true for me, I too am a valley filled with mist,
waiting for the warmth of the sun to release my soul
so I can belong not to one thing but to all things.
Loving
What a terrible thing
loving is, I mean truly loving,
not wanting, desiring or adoring
I mean truly loving, because true love lies at
the heart of destruction, it’s the only thing that remains
after all the illusions have flickered out and died,
love is the only thing that can survive the pain
of being used, abandoned or betrayed,
when there’s nothing else left
it’s all that remains.
Promenade
We went for a stroll
along the coastal path in Brittany,
on one side there was the scent of the ocean,
on the other the scent of heather and pine,
after 30 minutes you’d had enough
so we sat on a bench together
looking out over the sea
before we turned back,
I didn’t mind if we
were walking
or sitting, what
was important to
me was being with you.
Response
Maybe it was to do with
the constant sound of the ocean
outside our window, or the lack of distractions
afforded by being on holiday, either way
our contemplation this morning
was rich and deep, filled
with peace and love.
As I spoke I could feel
your wordless presence beating
my heart and moving my lips as I moved them,
this wasn’t a case of casual surrender,
we were dancing with each other,
our steps slow and deliberate,
my body alive in your arms.
I have never been
comfortable with the idea
of being entirely passive to you, in any case
I don’t believe it’s what you’d want,
who’d want to dance with a
partner who was unable
to move without them?
I know it’s my part
to respond and responding means
giving something, to or away, to answer the call,
but in this case the giving required
no effort, none at all, no more
than the effort needed to
fall or rise in love.
Peace
Peace has no need of circumstance,
it’s not a reward for being good or helping others
and it won’t come because you want it to,
those things belong to who you think
you are, peace comes from light,
it’s what surrounds you,
it’s who you truly are.
For ever
Today was just
one of those days
that lasted for ever,
the sun shone in a pale blue sky,
the ocean was serene and peaceful
and the air was filled with the sound
of children playing down on the beach.
We read, wrote poetry, went out for lunch,
slept with the windows wide open,
the breeze filling our room,
made tea for each other,
talked, didn’t talk,
were together
and apart.
It went on and on
and it never stopped,
I didn’t want to spend the day
doing nothing but once it started
nothing turned out to be so much more
than something.
Medicine
I’m a city boy
and being by the sea,
hearing the sea, looking at the sea
is like medicine for my soul,
it takes away my troubles
and eases my pains,
when I’m near it
I stop judging things,
leave them alone so they
can be what they are, and as the sea
fills me with echoes of home
so I become my home
and walk anew.
Moments
Just a moment ago
we were cleaning up a village house
in the middle of France, looking forward
to a whole month of rest,
now we are by the coast
with just two days
left before we
return to London.
Where did the time go?
The supermarket,
preparing food,
eating, afternoon naps,
reading, writing, walking,
taking photographs and
chasing sunsets before we went to bed,
nothing new, nothing special at all,
but we lived every moment.
New beginnings
We are unashamed
sunset freaks, each evening
we go out just before the sun sets,
sometimes with a camera, sometimes not
and we find a place to sit and watch
the gods paint the sky.
Invariably we also
get up early in the morning
so we can watch the sun rise,
slow, gentle, beautiful and delicate.
I should have noticed it earlier,
I can’t think why I didn’t,
but on this trip I saw
how the close of one day
is rivalled in it’s beauty only
by the commencement of the next,
both are steeped in fire and light.
There are no failures, only
new beginnings.